Review: Appalling Mall-Minja wall hangers!

Originally posted as part of Breach Bang Clear's ongoing Monday Night Knife Fights series.   

I talk about good knives, swords and axes a fair bit. I'm fan of dense steel with an edge. There's a lot of it out there, some good, some amazing, and some unspeakable trash. It's the latter stuff I want to discuss for a bit.
Lets talk Mall-Ninja wall-hangers. First you might ask, what's a mall-ninja?
A mall ninja is a breed of weapons and combat enthusiast characterized by being so ungrounded in reality as to make even the most hardcore gun nuts shake their heads. Equal parts naïveté, delusion, and obnoxiousness, the mall ninja contributes to countless ill-informed online debates concerning arms, armor, and warfare, and is a common consumer of assorted paramilitary woo, broscience, and shared misconceptions about history and the world. The term "mall ninja" is pejorative; no one self-identifies as such. We hope.
If you're worried there's a simple test you can take to assess your-mall-ninja status.   Good luck.
Now, if you're an avid Master Ken of "Enter the Dojo" disciple, you've probably had all the training and experience you'd need to make your own correct choices when purchasing your own pointies.
When it comes to some real Mall-Ninja wall hanger blade there are some key aspects that seal the classification:

1. Black. Real Ninja's need black weapons for their Tier One Wet Ops. Powder coated, painted, teflon coated, oxidised, it doesn't matter.
2. Cord-wrapped handle. Every real street-samurai wants their blade wrapped samurai style, and that means cord-wrapped.
3. Curves. Like every bad-lady out there it has a curves and every mall-ninja want's a bad lady of their very own.
4. More curves. See Above, but unnecessary curves are even better.
5. Extra cutting surfaces. Primary edges aren't very high speed-low drag. For true body-dropping power, you need blades on all faces.
6. Unnecessary serrations.   It's not a sharks mouth, buddy, its a knife. You need a chainsaw, get a Husky!
7. Tactical sheath. Drop-leg, back-scabbard or just "ballistic nylon".
8. A scary name. "No one would surrender to the Dread Pirate Westley."Add a few "NINJA, ZOMBIE or DEATHs in there for good measure.

However; there's a lot of shiny bling out there. Here's a quick guide to some examples.

A - Zombie ass kicker. This is a bad-assed blade, but a serious wall-hanger. Extra serrations, extra edges to catch and snag, it's styled after the Aztec war swords to look extra scary. Ribbon-wrapped rather than cord, and a pretty thin, light steel. I don't have much faith in it's utility.
B - Living dead apocalypse full tang ninja sword.  Twin blades are better than one, obviously. Extra curves and serrations along the non-striking edge of the blade, as well as holes cut into the blade to lighten it, adding weakness.
C -"Hunting Knife." Perhaps if you're the Predator tracking Dutch and the other Rescue Team members.. This no-name piece  actually performs pretty well, regardless of its extra curves, useless serrated spine and extra holes. Its "full-tang, one-piece construction" is quite sturdy and the cord wrap handle well done. It's pretty well balanced, well finished, and were not for the extra holes and the saw on the spine, it might not even qualify as a Wall-hanger for Mall-Ninja's were it not for the dual shoulder strap back-holster  and the extra holes.
D - Black legion undead machete. Scary name, and wicked post-apocalyptic hammer finish. Now just add to the list the impressive looking spiked knuckle-guard, the "zombie-green' cord wrap and the drop-leg sheath and you've a "take-em-all-out before they getcha"special to scare mom with if she ever busts in on you practicing kata in the basement. water-bottles and melons of the world beware. To be fair, the blade appears to be well made, but the fitting are a tad flimsy for my tastes.
E - Z-hunter-axe. Not really an axe. Not really a hunting knife. Unnecessary saw-back serrations, extra curves and hooked edges. Great cord-wrapping and a single piece of steel for resilience, with sick jolly roger logo for extra-scary pirate aesthetic. Maybe if you're going from to room on a beached Somali cargo ship? I have a feeling it wouldn't  serve too well dressing a water-buffalo either. But zombies? narp.
F -KA-BAR War sword On first glance, this one looks like a prime candidate for Mall-Ninja wall-hanging.   It's got some curve to it, a lurid green scale grip, for extra zombie killing power, and a fully decked out nylon thigh sheath. However, its a serious work horse of a knife, but the scary name, and green scale gives them the potential for Mall-Ninja wall hanging.
G - Ontario Black Wind. Not every Mall-ninja wants a blingtastic katana straight out of Highlander or Blade. Some might prefer a more-or-less traditional "ninja-to style" short, straight and heavy sword, which is exactly the kind of blade that the Ontario Knife Co. put into Army Disposals and into the pages of martial arts catalogues. This is a bad-ass blade, undeserving of any scorn, and is in fact one of my go-to blades in the event of Apocalypse or civil unrest.  Even with its high-speed looking kydex scabbard,  just too good to be a wall-hanger.
H -Cold Steel Gladius. Last up from my own collection is the hungry-for blood Gladius from Cold Steel. Now, even the mighty Roman armies had their own groupies and  modern-day hangers on, thanks to a steady stream of "sand and sandals" action pictures. The humble Roman ground-pounder was issued one of these Gaul-stickers and bade go forth and pacify the Empire. The modern version hanging on my wall would have been a high-tech marvel of construction but fit in nicely in the shield-wall. I don't recommend trying to take that angle when trying to explain why you have one lashed to your hip with your Company First Sergeant, but, if you wanted a big ass blade for defending the empire "outside the wire" you could do a lot worse than one of these.



Lets take a moment to talk thickness. Cheap blades are often cut or pressed  from sheets of thin steel. This doesn't offer much cutting mass, strength or rigidity, all things I would want in a fighting blade. Different steels have different densities so its hard to gauge what steel is in the kick-ass zombie slayer you found at the disposal store, but the thickness of the blade can be a good indicator. I've found the thinner the blade, the less likely to be a practical tool (unless you're cutting sushi or shaving).



So. My last bit of advice to prospective blade collectors: Buy quality. It needn't be expensive, but should be from a reputable maker, be it a big company or a small smith. Be sure to give your new-found tool a run through its paces, before staking your life on it, (and get some formal training if possible). Don't be a mall-ninja.

Heads up!: Zu Bladeworx Warmonger Releaase for Pre-Order

Zu Bladeworx Warmonger Available for Pre-Order

First published on Breach Bang Clear here:

One of my favorite bladesmith companies, ZU Bladeworx in New South Wales, Australia, is accepting orders for their newest bladed weapon: The Warmonger. Note that I didn't say "tool." I might sometimes use euphemisms when it comes to blades, but this is a weapon.

Apparently styled after the Imperial Chinese dadao knife, this hungry-looking cleaver will, I have no doubt, ship to you straight-razor sharp and ready to cut things in half. I fully expect the single piece construction that typifies ZU Bladeworx blades. That style, which has scales or embellishment, lends itself perfectly to cord-wrapping and multiple attachment options with the well-made Kydex sheathes and mounting hardware they offer, as well as  a number of finishes to suit your MOS.

If the name sounds familiar, you might recall them from this FFSK review.

So are cleavers tools or weapons? I chat with people about this often. Fundamentally it is the human brain that is the ultimate weapon; a knife, gun, or axe is just an inanimate object until the human brain gives it intent.
Some tools have been designed with a primary purpose aimed at combat. Some knives are clearly tools that could be used as weapons if intent was there. I know it grates on me when I watch Forged in Fire and they call EVERY knife a weapon.
As I mentioned to a ZU Nation member the other day, I like to design functional, legal and collectable weapons. Not necessarily for carrying or self defense, but to collect, like coins or watches. I call them weapons not to be a hero, but because I like industrial, futuristic versions of medieval and martial arts weapons.
I was at the cutting-edge knives display at the Sydney Show and was eyeing off some kiku and nemoto knives, very tactical-looking and scary to non-knife people. A guy next to me said, "What would you want that for? It is useless as a tool."
I told him it would be for my collection. What is the use in collecting cheap shit? May as well collect good stuff, or why collect at all. Would I carry a Spectre? No. I don't carry any knives to be honest. Do I play with them at home? All the time. Every knife we make is a functional tool, and an efficient weapon in the right hands.

Recently released and rapidly all-sold-out Omega weapons.

Warmonger preorder opened the 15th of September. Reapers opened July 1 so that makes it mid September for shipping. Machining on the Warmongers began September 15 so that seems like a good day to open the preorder. That way the Reapers and Spectres will be almost ready to ship out. Wave 2 Reapers will ship within days of Wave 1. I am actually trying to get these out a little earlier.
ZU Nation price will be $429 plus post for knife and kydex. Attachments extra.
Installment plan as follows;
1) $200 - (plus you can add attachments if you want them)
2) $229 plus post (about $20) due four weeks later
I've done one of these pre-releases and am extremely happy with my Grunt. It's a decent system and  I trust the folks at ZU Bladeworx to deliver.
Here is a batch of their also-sold-out Reaper weapons, commissioned by the ADF. This lot destined for the soon-to-deply 1RAR.
Happy Hunting, lads!

Late update from Matt of ZU:

"So more details on the Warmonger, subject to change but pretty sure it is right.
100 piece run, I can't see us doing a second wave.
Base blade with kydex is $495 (ZU Nation members get a coupon to take off $66 to make it $429 like I promised). This includes tufftride finish and black kydex (no attachments). Coupon will only work on wave 1 (in the unlikely event we so a second wave).
2 part installment. The coupon will work on installment 1.
Postage is $20 (3kg exp bag with sign sticker)
Options:
Cerakote one colour - add $25
Apocolypse Cerakote (red or bronze) add $75
Tek Lok - add $25"

Review: khukri

One of the first "real" pieces of weapon-steel I ever bought for myself was a khukri that I purchased on-auction back in 1997, with wages from a part time job I had at the time. It was a WW2 era Gurkah blade and was only listed as a "good" condition, but that was good enough for me!

The khukri is a traditional knife design from Nepal, where it is as much a piece of farm equipment, or household knife as it is a weapon. It fills the same niche as the machete does in the America's or Africa. It's a simple, uncomplicated blade that is up to the task of rugged, daily rural use.

Read the rest here on Breach Bang Clear! 


 .

They still work just fine and in fact, effortlessly bit into this beam, and I felt that in 5 or 6 chops, I could have parted it. Typically khukri's have a partial tang, which is burned into the wooden handle and glued in with pitch. I can tell you, that at 60+ years old, this blade was hungry for chopping, with not a wiggle or shake.

Viking Hardware piece

Raiding season is fast approaching, and many of you are yearning for adventure, salt-spray on your faces and the chance to prove your honor and win glory such that your forefathers and old-fathers  will sing your name and your children will ask to hear the stories again in the long winter of next winter.

But where you might find yourself loading up with kevlar and lead-spitting black rifles, and hopping in and out of HUVEE or MRAP, crossing seas aboard a C-130 or C-5, I thought I might cast your minds back some 1000 years to another group of hard-handed and steely eyed warriors plying their trade, by blood, fire and steel, as well as actual tradeable goods, the Vikings. I wanted to tell you a little about their wargear, and why it worked so well for them.


Read the rest on Breach Bang & Clear ...

Video Reviews: AK -Super Colubris, UC M48 Walking Axe, Skinning Axe, ZT - Deuce

Here are a few clips I've been saving for a rainy day, and there have been quite a few of these recently.

1. Kitchen knives and a pig head


2. American Kami Super Colubris vs pig head

My full review here:

3. United Cutlery M48 Walking Axe vs pig head

My full review here:
Follow up review here:

4. skinning axe-knife thing, vs pig head


5. Zombie Tools Deuce vs pig head

My full review here:

I hope you enjoyed these as much as I did making them, if there is anything else you'd like to see my cutting with, or cutting into, please drop me a line, and I'll see what I can do for you.

All bio-waste either goes to the pot, or to the critters. No wastage, no freeloaders...

Review: SORD - 870 Back

The good folks at SORD, who hooked me up with one of their very cool hoodies, were also kind enough to send me one of the items I saw on their website but have never seen the like of in person. As you are probably aware, I am big on being prepared, so it probably strikes you as unsurprising that I have a set of bolt-cutters. These were a hold-over from my University Scavenger Hunt days (I was head/on several Black-Ops teams, and later a Judge) but the knack of getting into, onto and around obstacles, and coming away, unscathed, with tools, with the prize has always been dear.
This is where something like the SORD 870 Back pouch would have come in very handy.

Explicitly designed to house the Remington 870 models of shotguns, as well as other breaching tools such as sledge hammers, bolt cutters and breaching bars. I was thrilled at the chance to get my hands on one and see what I could make use of it for.

Fitted with two twin sets of PALS/MOLLE attachment tabs (with integral hook-and-loop) and a Fastex style clip with a long webbing strap, this was exactly what I'd envisaged.  Constructed from what I believe is 1000d Cordura.

Internally the pouch has two main compartments, the larger, external one, and a smaller, tucked-away one. I hadn't noticed the smaller one until I had been loading it up, and I opened it up. Not owning a shotgun, I havent been able to test it out with its name-sake, but I certainly tried out a variety of my own stabby, cutty, smashy tools, and was very pleased with the results. The main pocket was a perfect fit for my off-the-shelf bolt cutters, holding them very securely for such a head-heavy tool.

The thinner back pocket seemed to be a perfect for for my stand-by tree-chopper, the Ontario BlackWind. I really wanted to fit it out with my Zombie Tool Deuce, but the Deuce was just too much sword for that pocket.

With the retaining strap holding it in place, I mounted the pouch to the side of my Platatac Light Field Pack and took it out for a trial. I barely noticed it. No sway, no rattle, not jiggle. In fact, with those top and bottom PALS/MOLLE fasteners in place, I barely even felt the pack shift from the extra weight. The low profile and rounded sides meant I had no snagging and better yet, I could even manage the fabled over-shoulder draw much loved by Hollywood, (as long as a buddy unclips the Fastex clips for me) However, this has allowed me to carry, comfortably and securely, two of my favourite tools of localised destruction.

Great piece. Well made and exceptionally well suited to the role it was designed for.

Review: Cold Steel - Gladius

At the same time I picked up my United Cutlery M48 walking-axe I also managed to scoop up my second Cold Steel piece, via the folks at Global Gear. I have had the Cold Steel Boar Spear for years, and have purchased several of their knives for people in the past, but have now added their Gladius to my collection.

I've known the Cold Steel products to be no nonsense pieces, and this is no exception. Styled after the Pompeii style standard sword of Roman Legionaries the Cold Steel version is referred to as a machete, and it certainly functions in this role.

The piece is double edged, and features a 48cm (19") blade, being 68cm (27") overall, and I thought the waisted head of the blade was was a nice touch, giving it an elegant line. Made of 2.8mm thick 1055 carbon steel with a baked on rust-protecting matte black finish, it is both light in the hand, at 510g (18oz), and with the large polypropylene handle, it is a well balanced piece.

When I un-boxed it, I found (as several other reviewers have noted) that the edge was a little rough, some burrs from the grinding process still apparent, which was a bit disappointing.  With a few passes with my DMT sharpeners, these cleared nicely. I have used it for clearing brush, and some test cutting, and found it to have good resistance to shock, and the finger groves to offer good purchase for the hand.  Here it is lined up against my wall-hanger gladius, which is much closer to the 1.5kg of the ancient pieces, but not the utility.

The pommel is drilled, to accept a lanyard, should that he desirable, which I think might be, as I felt the polypropylene finish to be a bit slick. Stippling could also help solve this.

I also wanted to compare this visually, up against the Ontario BlackWind, which is almost 400g heavier, and two-handed, but I was surprised to feel how much livelier the Gladius was. Interesting. Being thinner, it slices nicely, but I wonder about its resilience to stiffer abuse.


The sheath is made of Cor-Ex, which is to say some kind of nylon, with a hard plastic liner to protect it from the edges and stabbing point of the blade. With a simple belt loop, it wouldn't be a problem to wear this in Legionnaire style, but I'd also like to have some other means of strapping it to me. That said, for all my jungle-clearing action I think a belt-carry for this would be just fine.

I've also included a clip of me waving it about in a manly yet practical fashion, to give you an idea how it handles, and how it cuts.

Given its relative low cost, and solid construction I'd say this was a very good option for those who want more than just a simple a chopper in their machete collection. 

Home Front: membership

I've had some fun recently finding and joining up with some new organisations, for fun and education, licensing and commeradery.

I've been a member of the Victorian Kendo Renmei since 1998, and by association the Australian Kendo Renmei This has provided coverage under the Weapons Control Acts in Victoria for a number of items in my collection, as well as my practice of kendo and its associated arts.

To supplement that, and on top of my exemption by the Governor in Council as a bona fide collector, I also joined the Victorian Historical Edged Weapons Collectors Guild . I also signed up for my Paintball Marker License, after my run in with customs whilst trying to get parts to build a super cool looking lazer-tagger for the Stargate LARP I am involved in.



Then there are the more fun and exciting memberships. I've been a member of Immanent Threat Solutions Tactical for a couple of years now. They specialise in information, training and equipment to deal with, as the name suggests, Immanent Threats. From knot-work, to lock picking, survival navigation to urban threat assessment, as well as working with several groups of makers to produce some cool kit and reviews. I'm very pleased to be a part of their community, in my small way.

Zombease is a lot like my own writing, but specialising in Zombie Apocalypse scenarios. I really enjoy reading their content, Jake Sepulveda is a great guy, and I have enjoyed getting behind his line, and backing his projects.Try out the "Choose your own adventure" section and see how you go. Read all the guides first, and mentally equip yourself.



Zombie Squad is a philanthropic organisation dedicated to first response and support for ALL disasters, zombie or otherwise. They pride themselves on their mission to "educate the public about the importance of personal preparedness and community service, to increase its readiness to respond to disasters such as earthquakes, floods or zombie outbreaks."
I have been proud to help in their efforts to support the Hurricane Sandy relief drive (2012) and the Oklahoma Tornado relief drive (2013). Like Zombease, they also offer "zombie apocalypse" training and guides, but also apply these lessons to more mundane situations, for the benefit of their communities.

Lastly, and most recently added to my list of "professional associations"  in the field of Apocalypse Survival, is the Zombie Eradication Response Team. Who also offer real-world training for disaster preparedness, from a more martial perspective, that is an "organization that uses the Zombie as a metaphor for any one of numerous natural or man made disasters that have and will occur in our lives." I signed up and got some cool patches from them as well. I look forwards to connecting with other folks from "Squadron Q" (Australia) and maybe see you at an event.


I suppose my Health Informatics Association of Australia and Australian Society for Microbiology could also count ... I certainly keep an eye on the bulletins ...

Review: Cold Steel - Boar Spear

One of my first big "you have a job now" purchases once I got a "real job" (that is to say, a job in the field I studied at uni for 5 years for) was something I had to have ordered in for me. This was years ago, but I haven't regretted it one moment.

It was the beginning of my long friendship with the Platatac guys, because when someone walks into your outdoor and disposals type store and asks you to order a boar spear, and you grin, nod and find the catalog, that made me feel I'd found my brand. (edit: get in quick, they have one up on eBay)

Now, obviously, this isn't the kind of thing that they make themselves, or even keep in stock, but they had other products from Cold Steel under the counter and were only to happy to order one in for me, deposit on the counter and all (it would have been a big-ticket item to get stuck with if I'd done a runner on them). Shipping wasn't cheep, but I have to say, it was well worth it. This is the Cold Steel Boar Spear and it is seriously bad-ass.

The handle is a serious Premium American Ash pole, well finished and rounded. Hefty without being burdensome, and considerably thicker than the bo-staffs that I'd been very vaguely shown how to wield by friends.  It was also a lot thicker than the oval handled naginata hafts I've held, and the long spear equivalent, the yari. It deals a serious blow when swung, jabbed or butted with.

The head of the blade is an impressive 47cm (18 1/2"), with a bit over 30cm of that being the broad leaf head blade and all told, the whole piece measures in at 208cm (82 1/8"), and 1.9kg (4 1/4lbs).


The broad crossguards are rolled from the same piece of 2.4mm (3/32") SK-5 Medium Carbon steel that the rest of the spearhead is. These are here to keep your prey from riding up the spear after a successful strike, to maul you. They also serve the purpose of hooking over shield-walls, and catching and deflecting other weapons, when used in war. Not that they have been used extensively in war since the middle ages, but the practice is sound!

Cold Steel report that the blade is cold forged from their medium carbon SK-5 steel then heat treated to a spring temper, and is designed to flex under stress instead of breaking.

The blade also features a reinforcing rib, hammered into the spine, which stiffens it further, whilst also giving the haft a deep well to seat into. Holes in the neck, between the crossguards and the blade allow it to be screwed into place, or detached to transport, store or to use the blade by itself as a short-sword.

The edges are keen, and have given me no trouble over the years, although I must admit, I haven't been hunting with it, I have done drills, cutting and thrusting practice with it to great effect. This is a truly awe inspiring piece, and sends a very clear message when leveled at someones chest that you are not to be trifled with. (Oh, you'd like to think I don't know this from experience, but I'm afraid I do).

Cold Steel now offer a "Secure-Ex®" kydex-type material sheath, complete with press-stud quick release, and attachemnt options, but when I got mine, I made do with heavy leather, and whipped up a functional sheath.

Review: Zombie Tools - The Deuce

 "It's beginning to look a lot like fishmen"and what with the world not having ended with a Julian/Gregorian leap-day miscalculation on the 7th of December and with the 21st rapidly approaching, I wanted to get this message out there before the Mayan calendar starts blinking 12:00.

On December 31 1999 I took my Ontario BlackWind sword along to the "end of millennium / Y2K party. I wanted to have some trusty steel on-hand in case infrastructure went to poop.

I gave you a sneak peek at this a little while ago, and did a Wish-Lust write-up of it ages ago, and when I did some freelance work and had some spare cash, I placed an order for my very own ZombieTools DEUCE.

This arrival filled me with more joy than almost any arrival that wasn't my own blood, for some time. This is 1.36kg (3lbs) and 89cm (35") of singing steel.

No bones about it, this is a serious blade.

Here is me taking a few of my favourite kendo stances with it:

chudan no kamai

hasso no kamai

jodan no kamai

jodan no kamai

The back of the sword is a substantial 5.2mm (0.204") with a beveled edge to keep it snag and resistance free. The full tang of the blade fits neatly and tidily beneath a set of aircraft grade aluminium scales that have been machined to match the tang smoothly. There is great craftsmanship in this piece, and this is just one example of it.

The entire blade has been given a "distressed look" but don't let this fool you. The only distressing thing about this blade is the lack of legitimate targets that it hungers for.

The top of the handle shows off both the aluminium scales, and the very fine leather wrapping. There is a "bump" under the wrap, giving a very positive grip between index and middle finger. The fore-handguard and blade catcher give good geometrical cover for your grip.

The narrowness of the neck might have worried me, had I not seen Zombie Tools own "Destroying the Deuce" video  No fear of this being the cause of failure, for me.



The tail end of the Deuce features the ZombieTools logo nicely laser-cut through the pommel, which again shows off the blackened aircraft grade aluminium scales under the tough leather wrap. It would be simple enough to fit a retention lanyard through here, if desired.

The geometry of the whole of the hilt is really good, and allows both single and double handed grips with confidence and comfort. In my test cuts on some overhanging vines and shrubbery, I felt little or none of the shock that the BlackWind often offers with its single-piece cord-wrapped handle, far more akin to my "really-real" Japanese sword.

Speaking of "really-real" the Deuce has a full-tang blade made of 5160 spring steel, hardened and tempered. I wanted to measure it up against my other two go-to swords, the BlackWind, and my Hanwei Shinto. Going to basics, I put them side-by side with the Deuce and measured the balance points against both. Is clearly shows the differences in both the blade and handle geometry, as well as the fabled "balance point" which a swordsman will tell you governs how the blade feels in the hand, it's responsiveness, control ability, and cutting power.

Not wanting to go into the esoteric points of bladesmithing of which I am only a fan, and no expert, I can tell you as a swordsman, with 15 years of kendo and growing up with real swords that the balance of e Deuce is beautiful, both single and dual handed. Shorter than the Shinto, but with a similar handle, the kukhri-like forward swept head of the Deuce offers a chopping and hacking potential that the slicing Shinto does not. These are different swords, and act and feel different.

Both are vastly better crafted than the BlackWind, as the handling and use clearly tells.

The kydex scabbard the Deuce comes with is fitted with eyelets all the way down its length, at at it's tip, but I found that the throat of it was quite loose over the guard of the Deuce, and when running, or if inverted, the sword slips out easily. This was problematic, as having flailing razor-sharp steel slipping about when you are albeit ally maneuvering is a bad, bad thing. I plan to wear the Deuce on my hip, as I would a katana, or lashed to my back for over-the-shoulder storage, so in order to keep the blade secured, I opted to add some shock-cord to the eyelets, crossing it over the hand-guard which keeps the sword snug, but not so restrictive as to make it impossible to draw. Simple Iaido-style sword control with the left thumb is all that is needed to keep the Deuce snug, or free it, to do what it was made for.


I am thrilled to have the Deuce in my armory, and repertoire of steel. I look forwards to having it on hand for all my adventures, working out the best ways to wear and carry it, and putting its keenness, and it's ruggedness to whatever tests the world throws at me.

Riddle of Steel

The secret of steel has always carried with it a mystery. You must learn its riddle, little Conan. You must learn its discipline. For no one, no one in this world can you trust. Not men, not women, not beasts. [Points to sword] This you can trust.

Conan's father

Sneak Preview: Wish Lust gratification

Oh yes. Arrived this morning to guffaws and evil chuckles.

Video Review: Ontario Black Wind vs meat & bone

In the final of these three posts demonstrating the abilities of the KA-BAR Zombie Killer knives, Dead-On Annihilator, Stanley FUBAR and Ontario Blackwind, I will leave you with the abilities of the Blackwind, which I reviewed a while back. This now out-of-production blade is loosely based on a Japanese sword, being a single edged, two handed blade. This one is considerably shorter than a "standard" katana, and far less curved, being all but straight. It does lend itself to techniques that I am familiar with however, and I have used it extensively as a horticultural tool, hence my nickname for it, my "tree-chopping sword"


1 Ontario BlackWind vs beef leg-bone, following the KA-BAR Zombie Killer collection. Watch for flying bone fragments, which impressed the hell out of me. That's why I wore safety glasses!

2 BlackWind vs pig head. Now, this head already had some damage done, in the form of penetration tests from the KA-BAR's, but the damage dealt by the Blackwind goes way beyond this. I only have a little experience test-cutting, and have been away from kendo training for some time with an ankle injury, so my form was off, but it certainly got the job done, from a standing cut-chop point of view. (We generally practice a moving cut-slice in kendo) but fairly happy with how these two cuts felt, given the targets and placements.

All in all, I was very happy with these tests, the items I tested, and lastly, the great stocks I made from the leftovers. I hope you liked this series of posts, feel free to comment and make requests for my next video demonstration and review.

Video Review: KA-BAR ZombieKiller blades

I wanted to do some practical testing of the
Ka-Bar Zombie Killer Knives that I have been reviewing of late, and felt the best way to do this was to do some practice cutting. Rather than invite strangers into my back yard for tsujigiri - the act of testing a sword on a chance passer-by, or tameshigiri- on rolled, wet, tatami matting, I chose to use a variety of meat and bone sources. Beef brisket off-cuts (with both bone and cartilaginous ribs), a beef leg bone, and halved pig head were my targets of choice.I could have used cardboard, bottles of water, bamboo, tatami-rolls or even, horror of horrors, fruit and vegetables but I wanted a more authentic performance test.

I hung the beef sides from a beam, to give it the opportunity to swing and move freely and also did static tests with the the beef sides, leg bone and pig head on stacked logs. This was my first attempt at target cutting on meat, but was a very rewarding experience.

I tried to limit myself to the cuts, strikes and thrusts that I would use in a fighting situation, rather than what I might use in a demolition or handy-man type situation, in that I wanted to avoid over extension, and sufficient commitment to each cut to complete it whilst being in a follow-up position as well.

All the meat was retrieved and used to make some really delightful stocks, the fat rendered for lard and the remnants fed to my chickens to supplement their pellet, grain and vegetable scrap diet.



1 Hanging beef-sides Vs the "Death" Dagger and "Famine" Tanto are the smaller two, with the "War" Sword and the "Pestilence" Chopper being the larger two.


2 Stabbing penetration beef-sides Vs the "Death" Dagger and "Famine" Tanto, along with the "War" Sword. The "Pestilence" Chopper did not have a stabbing tip so was not used for this test.


3 Beef leg bone the "Death" Dagger and "Famine" Tanto, with the "War" Sword and the "Pestilence" Chopper . I also tried out my "Tree Chopping Sword", the Ontario BlackWind which I reviewed a while back.


4 Finally, I tested the three stabbing capable KA-BAR's against the pig head for penetration.

I was really pleased with how each of these knives (and my sword) worked out. They did indeed wreak devastation onto the targets, effortlessly cutting and stabbing, chopping bone without a noticeable blemish to the edges or coatings.

I hope you enjoyed watching as much as I liked making these, and stay tuned for some hammering from the Annihilator and FUBAR, next!

Review: KA-BAR Zombie "War" Sword

In my third installment of the
Ka-Bar Zombie Killer Knives series, and following on from the "Death" Dagger and the "Famine" Tanto I bring to you KA-BAR's rendering of the formidable tool of the bloody-handed god, rider of the red horse War. In fitting fashion, the KA-BAR "War" Sword, whilst being more of a big knife than a short sword, to my mind (the line is often hotly debated by blade enthusiasts) its lines harken to the ancient Greek Kopis swords, which featured a heavy forward sweeping, chopping head to the blade.

KA_BAR's take on this blade is a big and beefy blade, a logical progression from the Dagger and Tanto, and again as different to these two. Featuring the same SK5 steel, lurid green GFN-PA66 scales (again, with black versions included to take the glare off) and tough bead coated anti-glint finish as the other blades in this series, the "War" Sword stretches out to 38cm (15-1/8"), 24cm (9-3/4") of which is gently curving edge. The blade weighs in at 450g (1 lbs) but given the balance, feels much livelier in the hand than the Tanto, I found. The edge geometry is the same 20 degree taper-grind seen in the rest of this line, but the primary grind runs all the way from the spine of the blade, with a length of the back of the head of the blade having a secondary grind, for about the third of the width, presumably to reduce the weight slightly, a very subtle addition.

The whole of the blade "sits back" of the mid-line of the handle, as seen in the "Death" Dagger, with the edge sitting close to the finger line, with the spine of the blade sitting beyond the back of the handle. This allows for the back of the blade to feature a deeply crenelated thumb-grip much like that seen in the "Death" Dagger, allowing for a choked up, "thumb-on-top grip" useful for a variety of styles. I should add that these crenelations are very comfortable on the hand. Big enough to grip, not so big as to gouge. Similarly the front finger guard is a good size, and certainly gives the feeling of stopping fingers slipping forwards onto the blade.


I really like how this blade feels in the hand, combining a hefty but not heavy slashing and cutting blade, with a tip capable of stabbing. It certainly feels lively in the hand, as if it were willing slashes and strikes.

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